Lemony Snicket Ponderous Postcards
The Ponderous Postcards
(A Series of Unfortunate Events Movie Postcard Book)
Dear Postcard Enthusiast,
The postcards in the book you are holding do not display images of sunny beaches, memorable skylines, funny cartoons, national landmarks, tropical birds, fast cars, influential paintings, handsome politicians, beautiful sunsets, or great film performances.
Instead, these postcards feature images so distressing and unnerving that they are likely to make your postal carrier faint in fear, causing him to drop the postcards to the ground, where birds or squirrels might eat them. Your friends and associates will never receive the words you write on the back, and will believe that something dreadful has happened to you. Probably, they will conduct an investigation, and soon find themselves helplessly trapped in a web of intrigue and terror.
Clearly, you should purchase something less likely to cause trouble, such as cheerful greeting cards, or a handful of lollipops, if that's the sort of thing you prefer.
With all due respect,
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