Mr. Poe, their impotent (a word which here means ineffectual) legal guardian, having exhausted all options for finding them a new home with relatives, sadly entrusts his young charges' fate to a progressive guardian program formed with the premise "It takes a village to raise a child."

Before they know it, the Baudelaires are being whisked off on a bus to a Vile Village named "V.F.D." (This is the first of the references to VFD)

Of course, V.F.D. provides a clue to the tragic disappearance of the Baudelaires' friends, the beloved, equally orphaned Quagmire triplets.

To the orphans' dismay, V.F.D. is covered in crows--so much so that the whole village is pitch-black and trembling. Another disturbing element of the town is that the Council of Elders has thousands of rules, such as "don't hurt crows" and "don't build mechanical devices", which is unfortunate indeed for Violet, the inventor.

Fortunately, the Baudelaires are taken in by a kindly handyman named Hector who cooks them delicious Mexican food and secretly breaks rules. Still, neither Hector nor an entire village can protect the orphans from the clutches of the money-grubbing Count Olaf.

Note from Lemony Snicket:

Dear Reader,

You have undoubtedly picked up this book by mistake, so please put it down. Nobody in their right mind would read this particular book about the lives of Violet, Klaus, and Sunny Baudelaire on purpose, because each dismal moment of their stay in the village of V.F.D. has been faithfully and dreadfully recorded in these pages.

I can think of no single reason why anyone would want to open a book containing such unpleasant matters as migrating crows, an angry mob, a newspaper headline, the arrest of innocent people, the Deluxe Cell, and some very strange hats.

It is my solemn and sacred occupation to research each detail of the Baudelaire children's lives and write them all down, but you may prefer to do some other solemn and sacred thing, such as reading another book instead.

With all due respect,                              
Lemony Snicket

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